Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
