I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Randomize
