I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I wish they made helmets for livers.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
