he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
My pussy is not your playground.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
