i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
