So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Are my feet made of real feet?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
