I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
