Plan B is the new Plan A
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
