I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
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