I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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