I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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