Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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