Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
