Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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