Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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