yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
