Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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