when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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