It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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