i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize