party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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