so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Hippo gnu deer
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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