Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
