Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
