time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I have post one night stand depression
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