He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
