I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
