a queef is a wish your heart makes.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
There's always time for handjobs
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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