everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
