i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
