Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I am puke
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
