sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
