stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize