I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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