I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
