I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
