I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize