No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
