sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
no. you can't hotbox the world.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
