I don't think brook has ever known best
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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