just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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