But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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