I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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