This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
