I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
