I wannas sexs uuuuu
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
