hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
