Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
