Me too!
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
