I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize