So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
